Eeeh…I went to the church, and it was given to me the Holy Communion. The fact that I don’t fast or that I went to the disco last night, I drank and I slept around, doesn’t matter. How could the father know what I was doing? He’s just asking me if I’m smoking, or drinking and then he gives me the Holy Communion. The same applies before the wedding as well…little does it matter that I’m living in adultery, it’s fashionable, if I don’t do it, it means I’m not like the others…Lust is leading the way for all of your friends, if you don’t do the same, you will excluded…the more lustful, the cooler you are among them.
What’s the big deal if I took Holy Communion being unworthy of it and then I spat, I went home, lit a cigarette, and I’m still doing the same sins?
Unfortunately this is the sad truth. A father told me the other day that he tried to bring one woman’s soul closer to the church, he heard her confession, but he couldn’t give her the Holy Communion so he assigned her a small penance, and was preparing to give her holy Epiphany water. He had to hand her the water in a small room, so that neighbours not to see and mock her; till then she has never come back.
Unfortunately this is what happens in current modern cities. Did the father refuse to give me Holy Communion? I won’t go to that church anymore or I’d better go to another father or stop going altogether, what sins do I have after all (without being aware of Satan’s deceit)? So what, if the father called my attention to the fact that I showed up with make-up, primmed and trendy, I went to take Holy Communion and others should see it, right?
How could the poor soul know that she’s living for the Good Lord and not for other people, and one doesn’t have to be in fashion, but to be acceptable in front of God?
Fasting and prayers drive away dark thoughts and sins, and the confession washes away the dirt of sins, cleansing the soul. How could she know that the moment she’s confessing she’s standing before our Lord Jesus Christ who is there, present, forgiving one’s unworthiness.
The process of washing away sins through penance and holy Epiphany water should be a process of immense joy, receiving forgiveness!
Yet, in cities, general confession from the age of 7 up to present is not customary (could it be due to the lack of time?) and many don’t take it into consideration. They don’t know the importance of cleansing one’s soul. Many people don’t know, it could be a possibility, that’s true.
I had a father confessor in the city, …he asked me questions, I answered and that was all, I wasn’t thinking of saying anything else apart from answering his questions. Until about 6 years ago, when I went to a monastery, to a holy father and I thought I should confess. I read the confession prayers and I was waiting to go in, but I was so ashamed I wanted to leave (how was I supposed to know that Satan was trying to get me out of there?)
Finally, I plucked up courage, I asked the Father to bless me to confess my sins and I started. Honestly, at that moment I felt like two human beings into one, I wondered how could my mouth speak so much?! The Holy Father was in fact a seer in spirit, but because of the piety he had, and still does, he did not let it be known…he was just telling me parables and I remembered all the dirt I had done and confessed everything… even I couldn’t realize how I ended up having so much to confess.
At the end he told me for next time to write my sins on a piece of paper, all my sins from when I was 7 years old, and that I should use confession guides or the Romanian Pilgrim to remember them. When I went out, I felt I could fly…I was relieved and the holy Epiphany water was (and still is) the most precious thing…I found no words, and words are still lacking when I want to thank the Good Lord for the joy He had bestowed upon me. Since then, I felt change come gradually and if I tried to repeat any of the confessed sins, I could see the father before me, scolding me.
True joy after an honest confession can’t be described in words….
How wonderful would be for us to realize this aspect, which is in fact the most important. This holy father always reminds us that “we know neither the time nor the place when our lives will end, and we shall be taken in the state we are in, therefore, we should be ready at all times.”
Confession and Holy Communion are the most precious gifts the Good Lord has given to us, that kill the roots of sin and sorrow.
May God help us and may you have a blessed and easy fasting time!
Throughout their lives, human beings find themselves in continuous relish and never-ending feast; with or without realizing it, they enter a realm of amusement and temporary, worldly and fading joy. A vicious circle in which plausibility is born in the unexplored depths of our being through one single word: “probably.” When facing questions regarding God, many of us try to easily get away by using “probably” as a reply.
Is Christ the son of God? “Probably, possibly.” We refuse, more and more, to talk about faith, about saints lives, not to mention the Eucharist. Of all the people I know, there are only two or three persons with whom I can talk about the Truth. And yet, why? I believe that if we talked about the Truth, we would be able, God willing, to think in Truth, to feel in Truth, to believe in Truth, taking away from our hearts everything that is impure and soiled. And what is the Truth? This is a question we cannot answer by “probably.” There is no probability within Truth, only reality, authenticity. What is the first thing crossing your mind when you say “truth”? Could we not discover the truth in the very sense of our existence? Isn’t it by communion with Christ that we share in the true Light, the true Body and the true Blood of the Lord?
We are all summoned at the feast of faith and not of disbelief. We are all invited at the feast of true and everlasting joy, we are invited to Supper, where Truth is reveled. Yet not revealed through food and drink, but through the Holy Sacrament of Communion. This is the true Supper, the true “Sacrament of Christianity” to which we are called by the Savior; at this Supper, the soul is “cleansed” from the multitude of sins and injustices. It is during this Supper that we dress ourselves with the new clothes of the divine, taking off and throwing away the dirty clothes of sins: the stained clothes of the ancient man. Yet, no matter how much we talked or wrote about them we still find ourselves in the difficulty of seeing, and understanding spiritual matters. Have you ever felt how hard it is when you talk to a person and they don’t understand?
The same applies here too, as in order to understand the spiritual, to get an insight on Truth, to understand even more the purpose of our lives on this Earth, firstly we have to understand that our end will not be here, and it is not here, in death, that everything ends. Our true abode is not here. As you may have seen on TV, an increasing number of young people kill themselves; but the real suicide begins the moment that sins are uncovered; the spiritual suicide takes place here. Impurity and inner darkness put more and more pressure on us. Because they don’t know what to do, some people turn to suicide. Yet this is the reason why the Savior came into this world: “I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance.”
This is the comfort brought by the Savior to all sinners! To me as well as to you. Again He calls us: “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick.” How can you, as a human being, kill yourself knowing that He came into the world for you? Knowing that “He alone has the power to forgive sins,” as you read in the prayers preceding the Communion? Knowing that He alone has the power to heal your ill soul and your corrupted heart? When we commune in Christ, death has no power over us, this is why the Savior tells us: “Whoever eats My flesh, and drinks My blood, has eternal life; and I will raise him up at the last day.” Let us tremble at these words filled with truth, let us believe in them with our whole being.
It is not sad what happens outside, but inside ourselves. All these vices are born inside us, inside us takes place the refusal towards faith, confession, joy and eternal Life.
We have a taste of and we feast on the worldly, yet nothing compares to the living and imperishable sweetness of our Savior Jesus Christ. He, Himself makes us worthy of tasting this sweetness through breaking His body and spilling His own Blood. If a person is sad, neither the most delightful food in the world, nor the best chocolate can change their inner state. Yet the Lord changes this state through His life-creating nurture, through everlasting nurture, through infinite sweetness. How wonderful is the Savior’s Sacrifice, as He who was Crucified for us, is inviting us today into His Home, the abode of Light and Truth, inviting us at His table. Let us take the first step towards entering this Kingdom of eternal Joy, acknowledging that He is the only one who makes our existence meaningful in this “journey,” this “pilgrimage,” as the Saint Apostle Paul calls it.
Let us say today: “O Lord, how wonderful are your works, in wisdom have you made them all.” (Ps. 103, 24) Let us rejoice and praise God’s things! Just as a father tightly holds his child in his fatherly arms, so the Lord rejoices, revels and receives into his arms the one who rushes towards Him.
May God help us!