Love is not a feeling. One lives love through feelings, as well as through the bodily senses, but it is actually a strength given to us by God, it is the strength to renounce ourselves, to offer ourselves to the other. There are several forms of love, we know that there is the love of friendship, the eros type of love and the agape type of love; the latter is the love that God asks of us when He says: ‘Love each other as I have loved you.’
The Church teaches us to love the way God does, to love with God’s love. Like in the relationship with God, in the relationship with the one we love – may them be our child, our mother-in-law, our mother or our husband – we don’t rely on feelings. We thank God when the feelings are positive, we bear the negative ones, but we rely on the strength that God gives us in order to love one another. Love has the form of forgiveness, it has the form of weeping – when a beloved one dies our love is mourning, it is grief, it is weeping and we don’t say ‘stop weeping, forget it…’ Why shouldn’t we weep? We weep with longing, we weep with self-pity because we have been left alone. But we have the hope that they are all right. This is my love and this weeping never ceases if it is the death of a child, but this doesn’t mean that we stop smiling, that we stop enjoying life, but we weep for the love which we now live in this form.
How can you let yourself guided by God’s will, but not in the meaning of becoming careless? Just like this, you go ahead and do it! ‘Lord, let Your will be done!’ And when you feel like acting in any way, say: ‘Is this God’s will?’ And this thought alone is enough for you. If I intend to do something I say: ‘Lord, I want to do this, but may Your will be done, not mine.’ And I accept the option which doesn’t work out, because then it means that that is how God wanted it. I tell Him what I want because I know what I want, I have given some thought to it, but I leave room to God as well. When I don’t know what I want then it is something that doesn’t come from God. I must make the choice. God doesn’t choose for me. I have taken the decision, this is the way I would like to act, but may You, Lord, decide. Or in some situations I seek the advice of my parents who have more experience, I consult my confessor.
Translated by Claudia