In our youth we wonder often what is the will of God with us, what is His plan with ourselves. Why do we say “May Your will be done” and not mine in Our Father prayer? Why do we have to ask the will of God first in order to receive what we want? Within us occur thousands and thousands of desires; some are good, and some less than good. Sometimes we are willing to do anything to make our dream come true, and once accomplished, we realize that the result is just not the one we thought it would be. The, we easily ask ourselves: “why is this not to my benefit?” We ask for reasons, clues even, “signs” from God; we continue to pray and yet wishing that our will may be done.
As a parenthesis, I would like to share with you a bit from my own experience. For two years I’ve been asking in my prayers for something that in the end turned out to be not to my benefit but against me. I was constantly asking for that dream to come true, with prayers, akathists and bidding prayers. I thought that God wanted the same thing for me. But still, time passed and my prayer didn’t receive an answer. I was living under the impression that God disregarded my call. That He wasn’t answering my prayers anymore, and so I fell…I couldn’t understand what was wrong. I couldn’t understand what His will was, regarding me. I tried to force things, but still no change. Thousands and thousands of thoughts were filling my mind…Thoughts that managed to transform my “small” fallen into a profound and dark fallen.
All this until one day when…A dear soul sent to me by God brought me back to reality telling me that “God is not a jukebox which fulfills desires and we get mad at him after that”. Then a second person came that told me that God has something better in His mind for me. At that moment I didn’t understand much, but now I do, very clearly. I hope you will understand too, not from me but from our heavenly Father who knows what is best for us.
So, why do we have to ask for His will to be done and not ours? For only He knows what is best for us. He knows what is useful for us, and He will work in our hearts only if we allow Him to. And how do we do that? With: “May your will be done, not mine!” It is one of the shortest prayers and at the same time, one of the hardest prayers to say. “May your will be done” is one of the hardest thing to say in my opinion because it means self-denial.
Those who are seeking to do the will of God are called by Christ Himself his relatives, as it is said in the Holy Scripture: “For anyone who will do the will of God, this is my brother and my sister and my mother” (Mark 3:35). How great this can be; through His holy will, Jesus Christ unites us with Himself, making us His brothers, and His sisters. Doing God’s will doesn’t consist in just asking Him constantly in our prayer so that His will be done, it also means that we have to fulfill his commandments. Fulfilling his commandments helps us to find the way; it helps us to understand that what God has planned for us is better than what we’ve planned for ourselves. We must not rely only on our own desires because without Him we can not do anything. Without His will we wouldn’t have existed in this world, without His will, the scripture wouldn’t have been fulfilled. That is why it is important for us to say in our prayers “May Your will be done!” Through these words we hand over our life in God’s hands, because like our Savior says: “the world passes and it’s lust, but who does God’s will, will remain for all eternity”.
God’s will may be our will when we don’t ask for things from this passing world, when we don’t ask for a selfish wish to come true but we let God do how he knows best. When you say “May your will be done” now, in the present, you actually say for later “This is what I actually wanted from You, but I didn’t know from the beginning how good it actually is what You had given to me!” In that way you let Him be in your life and you live as He wants you to live, and not the way you wanted to. Usually, what we think we need in this world and for this world, it is not what we need for our salvation. Let the Giver of all live inside of us asking him constantly to let His will be done with us, for only then we will understand what His plan with us is, and how we really feel in His loving arms. We will have that incredible feeling of safety, that unexpected joy, that immeasurable love of the One who said in the Gethsemane garden before He gave Himself for us: “Not My will, but Yours be done…!”
Translated by Closcaru Georgiana