Sexuality

The effect pre-marital sexual relationships have on society

I know that nowadays young people are assaulted from all sides with all sorts of images and they give up to all this gathered sexual tension starting their sex-life as young as 14 years old. The others, who haven’t started it yet, feel a strong peer pressure, which, many times, is more in their minds, rather than a real pressure.

This is the reason they feel like something’s missing in their lives and, wanting to be like their friends, they push it too far, searching any occasion to have sex so that they are able to give a relaxed answer to the question “are you still a virgin?”.

What can a 14 year-old boy know about life? Or a girl this age, what a relationship based on love is? What can the two understand about the intimate relationship between a man and a woman, about the extraordinary mysteries that lie beneath? Too little. At this age everything is just an experiment with a dose of courage.

What would I do if my 3 years old daughter comes to me when she’s 14-15 and asks me “Dad, do you think I should start my sexual life?”. I would have only one answer, on which I’d insist: “If you start your sex-life before marriage, you only deprive yourself of God’s help in the future”.

Many people fight back straight-away when you tell them that making love before marriage is a sin: “How can it be a sin, it’s something normal!”. Sex-life outside family-life is a sin because it has huge chain-reaction effects on our society and, more important, on tomorrow’s society. It’s so simple to see those effects nowadays:

  • Sexual-content images have invaded the media decades ago, promoting anything that would trigger our animal instincts.
  • The number of divorces has increased dramatically because of adultery (the husband or the wife cheats on their spouse).
  • Living together, without being married (cohabitation) is a common nowadays, its main purpose is having the advantages a family offers, but without the responsibilities that come along with it.
  • Prostitution.
  • The huge increase of homosexuality.
  • Abortions, which are an effect of outside family sex irresponsibility.

These libertinisms that we live in, of having intimate relationships with anybody – anytime will have a consequence on our children.

Why is it a sin to make love before marriage? Because, by doing this, you harm the whole society. Intimate relationships before marriage deteriorate family and family is the base brick of the society. Family is a resemblance of the Holy Trinity, where the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit live in the same being, in an ocean of love. If we destroy family, we strongly deteriorate the quality of life. That’s why God punishes the sexual relationships outside the family.

The sin is wrong and it brings along with it punishment only because it has negative effects on the people around you.

Don’t deprive yourself of God’s help in life by doing this awful sin! I’m not saying that God won’t help those who fall in this sin, but that He helps them less, letting them see what they have lost by not obeying His commandments..

(Claudiu)

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Discussion

7 thoughts on “The effect pre-marital sexual relationships have on society

  1. While I share your perspective on having sex at age 14 as I find it extremely early, I think you forget that the age expectancy at the time the Bible was written was of less than 40 years and that people DID get married at that age.

    Also, I believe it is wrong to say that God helps the people that have sinned less than the ones that have not. God loves all equally. Also, I believe it would make more sense that the sinners would need help a great deal more than the people that are already doing things the ‘right’ way.

    One more thing: I do not see why you would say that people that live together as a family do not have the same responsibilities as people that are married. I do not support cohabitation, I just think that argument is invalid.

    Just before I forget: since God loves all, I see no reason for us people to show hatred to homosexuals. It was, after all, God that made them that way.

    Posted by Arya | September 7, 2011, 8:13 pm
  2. Hy Arya!

    The Bible is a collections of books, each one written in a different period of time. The life expectancy wasn’t 40 years. As you know, Noah live more than 900 years.

    The one who sins, deliberately separates himself from God, choosing to do what he want’s, independent of others. Doing so he will deal with the consequences of his deeds. The consequence of the sin is death, says Saint Apostole Paul.

    So those who sin refuse the help of God, not wanting to accept His plan and His will.

    Gods loves us all, sinners or not-sinners, but sinners refuse to cooperate, and that’s why thoso who obey Him receive more help than others.

    Marriage between two christians who are part of the Orthodox Church, recieving the Holy Body and Blod of Christ, is totally different than cohabitation.

    God made the human, man and woman, so from the beggining the human beeing is designed as two persons.
    Homesexuality is imoral and was very bad punished in Sodoma and Gomora.

    Saint Paul talked about homesexuals and said that they won’t inherite the kingdom of God, because they confused something very easy to perceive.

    Posted by Claudiu | September 7, 2011, 11:05 pm
    • Noah has been said to have lived 900 years and even if he did, it was a miracle and not an usual occurrence. I am basing my arguments on facts about skeletons found in tombs dating back from about 2000 years ago.

      I know what the Bible says on sins, but I was just raising a question which I believe is valid: why would believers receive more support than the lost sheep? You cannot find it if you do not seek it. As a result, people that do not believe in God should be the ones He helps most.

      You are though ignoring the fact that whenever God was unhappy with what people were like, He made sure those people were punished. [Sodoma and Gomora, the flood, and so on] Do you honestly believe that the situation would be different if God was unhappy with homosexuals? Or better yet, why would they be born this way if God thought they were so unworthy of the things that are available to other believers? I know a couple of middle aged men who are the kindest, most generous people I have ever met. They also believe in God and that He loves them just the way they are or they would not have reached the point where they understood that it would have been a bigger sin to pretend to love women and have children with them when their hearts said the opposite. They just adopted a 2 year old and are awesome dads and are raising the child to believe in God, but also to believe that love between two people is right, because God makes it happen, because He is the one that gave people the ability to love, which separates us from animals.

      A case has also been made against abortions. I wanted to raise a question about that as well. Say a woman has a particularly delicate pregnancy and the doctor advises to terminate the pregnancy because otherwise it would mean death for both the mother and the child. Or say a woman is pregnant as a result of a rape and as a result suffering of PTSD. She knows she could never be a good mother for the child since she relives her torture in her mind every single time she thinks of the baby. Do you still think the abortion should not happen in these cases?

      Posted by Arya | September 8, 2011, 10:31 pm
  3. Hello, Arya!

    First of all, we all know that God is love. He, with His enormous kindness, helps us always, even though we don’t deserve and don’t understand his help.
    Faith, a theological virtue, stands at the very heart of our Christian life.
    There are in the Bible many exemples in which God helped the people who begged Him, because of their strong faith. Thus, it is very important to have faith in order to be helped.
    Besides, how would you expect that people who are not believers to be helped more, considering that they don’t actually believe that they can be helped?
    But God may also help the persons who don’t believe in him, to came to know Him and to become believers. There are so many cases. God wants the salvation of every soul.

    Secondly, I wanted to say that homosexuals were not born that way! God didn’t make them homosexual.
    God gave us all the free will – the freedom to choose among the possibilities we have. So, the sins are the result of human’s bad choice.
    Orthodoxy condemns the sin of homosexuality – so Orthodox people who live in this sin are supposed to know that they’re not on the right path. But you know what? I remember I’ve read somewhere that, according to a study, most of the homosexual believe that their behavior is not right! So, even though those persons who live in this awful sin haven’t got the opportunity to be taught about the doctrines of the right faith (which is the Orthodoxy), they do have in their nature the belief that their behavior is wrong.
    Also, our religion does not encourage us to hate the homosexuals, but the sin of homosexuality. It is a difference.
    Besides, if they change their lifes – by taking the decision of quiting their sin and having a Confession, God forgives them and they can be saved.
    Moreover, keep in mind that God’s mercy is infinite, so He is waiting for them to change.

    Abortion is a crime. So it is NEVER reccomended, no matter of the circumstances.
    God does not make mistakes.
    It would be so much to talk about this subject…

    Posted by 4ndreea | September 27, 2011, 3:13 pm
  4. The “right faith”? You’re pretty sure about that. How could you ever know for sure that yours is the “right faith”? I’ve met many sour, bitter people in your religion that I would not say are in the “right faith”. I’ve also met many Muslims who are kind and calm and happy. How do you explain that?

    Posted by Adrien | October 13, 2012, 11:38 pm
    • Orthodoxy is the right faith because it proves herself.Any wish we have happens if we really trust God( a muslim doesn t get from Allah what we get from Jesus Christ and this conclusion and by the elementary logic that we cannot be right both of us).Also those of us who recive the Holy Body and Blood of Christ can confess more or less that we felt somethig special,like supernatural. I used to doubt this Mistery and I got back such a strong answer that now even though I am not a very virtous person I know what teaches Orthodoxy is real.

      Islam is a „sever” religion wich promotes fairness and of course if you cut someone s hand for stealing,then the criminality rate is lower.In islam you are also allowed to lie if it is for a „good cause”,while Orthodoxy theaches us to love till sacrifice, to forgive the one who mistakes so to be able to learn that he is wrong,not to feel sorry that been catched.I guess many orthodox people are not an exemple because our religion gives us freedom to choose more than any other faith,but this doesn t affect the Curch s doctrine and the Truth is still accesible for those who search.

      Anyway I cannot convince you only with my testimony, all I can do is to share it,God will be the One who will make us understand IF we are interested and ask Him for that.

      Posted by daniela | August 7, 2013, 12:29 pm

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